Nothing in this US of A says take me seriously more than a pretty little news anchor, who was once Miss Ohio, boasts a communications degree rather than a journalism degree, and just released a country music album! Woot! Give me more headline news, Robin Meade!
Robin Meade, the anchor of her own morning news program on HLN (CNN’s sister network) called Morning Express with Robin Meade, has been jump starting morning news ratings for a while now, particularly with the male population. And why not? Cutesy, kind of bubblegum-ish looks and killer legs will draw in just about any man… but folks, save this for Spike TV not the news.
Let’s get this out the way… what I am about to write may seem to be trying to diminish Meade’s achievements. This is not the case. I think it is fantastic that she won Miss Ohio, was in the top ten for Miss America, was voted 2004′s sexiest newscaster by a Playboy poll, and won an Emmy award for her coverage of a collision between a school bus and a train in Fox River Grove, Illinois back in 1995. I also think it’s great that she has a degree, whatever it may be in, and I think it’s just the shit that she has used her title of “Spank Bank Newscaster” to launch herself a little country diddy. Superb, Robin. Truly.
So now Robin Meade has released a country album titled Brand New Day, (oh, how pleasant), with hits such as a cover of Don Henley’s Dirty Laundry, a tribute to the stories she covers (not kidding) and her song meant to accompany her morning show called Morning Sunshine (not kidding).
What inspired Robin’s music career? Well, as it would turn out… the stress of being a “perfect” news anchor. ”I was failing at being the perfect news anchor that I thought I was supposed to be. In other words, never messing up. I was so busy filling the prescription of what makes the perfect news anchor that I was losing my authentic self, and it manifested itself in the form of panic attacks on the air,” Robin said, according to CNN.
In order to overcome her anxiety she did what any girl would do; she hummed a little tune and eventually got a record deal. Duh.
Oh, but it gets better, friends. Now, HLN is asking you to submit your original jingle to be the new theme song for Morning Express with Robin Meade! (Enter Here.) So, pretty much Robin gets a record deal and then decides that she also wants a reality competition. (Nothing says take me seriously like a reality competition. Duh.)
Typically, this would not bother me. However, these are the programs that are supposed to be delivering us news. You know, that stuff we should be taking seriously. And here they are, doing everything in their power to keep me from doing just that.
I’m sorry Robin. I know you’re begging me to heed your words and say things like “that Robin Meade, she sure does good things for the news industry,” but…
I… just… can’t.