Nothing Says ‘Life of the Party’ like Dead

In what could be one of the most creepy news stories I have had the privilege to read in a while, two men┬áRobert Jeffrey Young and┬áMark Rubinson, drove around with their friend Jeff Jarrett’s dead body in the car and painted their hometown red! Okay, maybe a taboo way to mourn, but it gets better. The two then went out and got themselves a couple rounds of drinks, burritos, and lap dances all on their generously dead friend Jeff’s debit card… (while Jeff waited patiently in the vehicle, of course).

Ah, yes. Nothing says friendship like loading up your dead friend’s corpse and going out on the town (um, and on your deceased friend’s credit card). I’ve always enjoyed buying my nearest and dearest pitchers of beer and high class, gentlemen entertainment such as pole dances and boobie tassels… and I sure do hope they continue collecting even after I’m dead, too.

The two Creepy McCreepster’s are being charged with abusing a corpse, identity theft and criminal impersonation, however not Jeff’s death because how Jeff died has not yet been confirmed. (Although, I must admit, the anticipation is killing me. I’m sure it was a noble death judging from Jeff’s choice of company.)

Note to my friends: When I die, at least have the decency to place me center stage of the party. Prop me up on your shoulders and order me a shot of whiskey. Seriously. I would be assuming that I would have had a long day after dying.

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