Category Archives: a self-affirmed critic

Top 5 things I Want to Say about the VMA’s

As is the case every year, I didn’t watch the MTV Video Music Awards- partially because I’m a self-righteous warrior riding a high horse of anti-everything mainstream, but also because I can’t afford cable. ¬†No, instead, this year in grand … Continue reading

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SUPER HOT BABE ALERT!

Hi! And welcome to the Super Hot Babe Club where we share with you a bunch of super hot babes and you jerk off while your wife is at her once-a-week Zumba class and your kids are watching¬†Frozen for the … Continue reading

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Your Server Hates You (And other Restaurant Truths)

There are few industries that can destroy a person’s faith in humanity as quickly as the restaurant industry, and there is no doubt that the servers have the most harrowing of all jobs within. Mainly it comes down to the … Continue reading

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BREAKING NEWS: Maple Syrup is Actually Heroin!

It was 5:08 a.m. when our anonymous source woke up- both she and morning still blanketed with darkness. Fighting back the urge to pee, she reached over for her cell phone to shut off the alarm she had woken up … Continue reading

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Oh, the romance! (And a missed connection to boot.)

Anybody that knows me, knows that I have a thing for the Craig’s List “missed connections.” I check them every morning. I check them throughout the day. I end my night by laying in bed and giving them one last … Continue reading

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They don’t sell hugs at the mall.

I hate malls. I can’t stand them. I didn’t even know this about myself until a few weekends ago. I thought I loved them. Mainly because I love shoes, but still… I didn’t always feel this way. I’m like many … Continue reading

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Fifty Shades of [Censored]

I’ve given into society’s questionable choice in books before, even though it usually takes some time. I resisted the Twilight series for years up until I saw a picture of one of the werewolves with no shirt on in a … Continue reading

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Attention: Mila Kunis has my Butt

I’m a sucker for anything romantic. Most people don’t believe that, but it’s the truth. Books, strangers’ stories at the bar, wedding pictures, blah, blah, and of course… Chick flicks. I’m pretty sure the adoration of romantic comedies and movies … Continue reading

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“The Road” by Cormac McCarthy

This book had been sitting on my shelf for over a year, as many books do. The recommendation had been sitting scribbled in a man’s handwriting for even longer than that in a notebook that I carry around with me. … Continue reading

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“Don’t Breathe A Word” by Jennifer McMahon

There are a few reasons why I picked up this book, and all of them are traditionally bad reasons to pick up a book. I’ll be honest about that, but I’ll also admit that the traditionally bad reasons to pick … Continue reading

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“God is Dead” by Ron Currie Jr.

I have always been a firm believer in judging books by their covers. This is not to say, that if I see a book with a cover that is not striking to me at once, that I will avoid reading … Continue reading

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Olympic Waste of Money

Billions and billions of people tuned in yesterday to watch a little thing known as the opening ceremonies of the Olympic games. The few people that filled bar seats at the Sushi Bar- and myself diligently behind the bar mixing … Continue reading

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The Help: Sugar-Coated Bites of a Real Dilemma

As I have mentioned before, I have a tendency to judge books rather harshly. This is especially true for books that the nation (oh, silly nation) praise and recommend, and this is most certainly the case with The Help by … Continue reading

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“Brick Lane” by Monica Ali

A fact that many do not know about me, nor usually believe once they find out, is that I am a total sucker for a love story, especially a complicated love story. So typically if I scan the words love, … Continue reading

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The Fresh Scent

Yesterday, I asked my boyfriend to pick me up a product on his way home from work. A product that I need and a product that immediately made him giggle at the thought of purchase. Tampons. First, let me begin … Continue reading

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